retro kitchens - kitchen nostalgia or shredder material? #2

 

The one thing this kitchen has going for it is that it was secretly made to coordinate with this web page (I swear it did before I removed the yellow from the page), a project begun 40 years ago in a remote hamlet of western Oklahoma, being planned to later emerge from the kitchen graveyard for the WORLD to enjoy see gape at in March, 2007. What is wrong with this kitchen, let me count the ways:


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  • the cooktop is crammed next to the ovens
  • the dishwasher is way too far away from the sink (the sink is purposely recessed to have the DW next to it, which would function well, but not if it were not recessed, thus no need to be so far removed, a little, sure)
  • the unbalanced left side as opposed to the right, not that asymmetry isn't a good thing, but this isn't even asymmetry
  • I feel like I will enter a cave if I stand at the sink - maybe if I got lucky, I'd go through a time warp and arrive in the future with no memories of where I'd been, an apron having been replaced with live-in help!
  • the, um, rug - doesn't it just call someone to do the dishes? And, we know it's a woman with a house dress on.
  • the top heavy wallpaper
  • the fabulous gold countertops!
  • if those are custom dishwasher panels, give me the UN custom vintage DW!
  • Last but not least, and probably not last, let's not forget the black toekicks!

 
Did I forget anything? The one good thing I have to say is that there is not a hodgepodge of different door sizes to cause chaos, that's a minor good thing. OK, I'll say it....there's a little piece of me that just says "awwwwwwwww" when I see this kitchen.